The key to my recovery
is on the path of life
heavy, sometimes
unlocks an invisible door
am I willing?
no knowledge helps me
unless I am active
in my intent
love is on the way,
heavy, sometimes
a barrier to contentment
Nature lifts me higher
over the grass and trees
Sometimes I stumble
over bricks streaked brown and red
fired in the world below
A place I never want to go to
there is no destination
travelling is the point
others around me
fellowship of the spirit
eternal now...
Fire, Air, Earth, Metal & Water
elements so strong
part of the world’s order
do they contest with one another?
or guide us closely
like a true lover?
a Chinese philosophy
so old, but helps us see
our house, our garden
a view over the sea
a purge of clutter by the door
will help us live
and not just survive
little things around our space
makes me feel at home
it is really my place!
How can I remember what I’m doing,
when life conspires to throw me – adrift?
Stress and worry
blank out my mind
unless and until
I can truly unwind...
caught up like a gladiator
fighting a lion
I forget the way out
unseen but so near
it’s only a game
but I still feel the fear
the button eludes me
till finally I know
it’s not really me that’s running the Show!
Oh what a tangled bed we weave
when we venture for reprieve...
afloat today
water all around
stars guide me
the dark night of the soul
is left behind...
am I a happy person
now
opportunities arise
like a hippopotamus
coming out of the river
will the African queen
reappear in my life
my daughter
born of much pain
while I grow older
and youth appears
the cycle begins again...
Waking in the morning
can I have the day go my way?
or is there a sense of wonder...
finding through not knowing
will I lose myself...
and gain something new along the way
the past weighs heavy on me
it will always be there
whether I like it or lack acceptance
to forge ahead
I can pretend to be confident
if I’m not
There are waypoints as I travel,
friends
some close, others further away
their lamps shine
as I discover the future that is mine...
Will I ever find hope?
in the day ahead
expansive, free of thought
I feel new life
Where does it come from?
not from the Sun and the Rain...
It came from the pain of long ago
Unknown, unspoken and unloved
like a dirty child playing in the mud
a cool voice calls her
she looks up and turns her head
a warm room and a meal in front of her
why not move on?
a gumboot is stuck in the damp earth
Let it go, let it go
part of us is left behind
Like a sinner on a Sunday
come home for a roast
and discover the gaps in time in front of me...
I break down the word
like it shatters my life
as persistent as
a prisoner’s strife
A hidden affliction
in the dead of the night
leads to a feeling
that something’s not right
Will it shorten my life?
Some people think so
Engulfed in this nuisance
I try to let go
A release of ambition
annealed by fire
this things got me beat
no point in desire
like a marionette
I’m jerked on a string
I cannot fight back
it just increases the sting
a breeze passes by
I look up in hope
has the man and his hand
let go of the rope...
will I be free
to enjoy natural slumber
or does this clown
really have my number?
I get extra time
to read and compose
and look on the bright side
of no nightly repose...
Where is that Sandman?
I beg and implore
to show that controller
the ultimate door...
That fiery demon
deep within me
is restless
and discontent
It has no external power
For me
there is only one
Universal Being
I trip myself up when
I hold on tight
to my desire
for a world shaped by me
the isness is
what I’m really looking for
a blossom, a red sky
as potent as a new day...
I rearranged my kitchen
parallel path
to building huts
on the side of a small volcano
A human instinct
as old as time itself
satisfaction innate
as I turn my surroundings
into something past and present
Will my house be perfect?
Never.
Do I love it?
Very much.
Our huts were disposable
now my life depends
on a cottage roof
Rain out. Love in.
a place to play, and be real...
Small steps
etched upon my mind
the primrose path
layered with tiny red chips
ha’penny clutched
in my sweaty palm
anticipation
that sweet jet plane
will melt in my mouth
a big expedition
for a small solo boy
now that memory
centres me
as I sink
towards
the Land of Nod.
Prisoner of Self
Sitting on the shelf
of unlimited expectations
my ego squirms
under the light of day...
sleep won’t come
rest is on the run
until I accept
bodily limitations
Joy was a thing
of yesterday
as I look into the depths
of an event horizon...
I tested the fabric of reality
and ended up with my tent in shreds
I walked 12 miles with my mind on fire
and spent 3 months in a hospital bed...
At first my God was in everything
an ancient people’s way
then I was led to a fireside
and that’s where I chose to stay
The need for a fix of sweet delight
enlightened the night for my soul
with many friends, a path without end
and a life that makes me whole.
A day at the Zoo
The bonobo scowled at me
he did not like me looking...
Who was zooming who?
I saw a wild animal
a 10 year old girl
throwing a tantrum on the ground
Poor polar bear
paced around and around
in the hot New Zealand sun
ice creams melted
‘Do not feed the animals’
but it’s OK to stuff yourself
The hippopotamus was the worst
annoyed by laughing watchers
he fanned his little tail
and sprayed shit everywhere
Lou Reed said it was a ‘Perfect Day’
But I saw something else
teasing, taunting
an expensive tour
for little children
and parents
who must endure.
You overestimate me too much
I have a yen for yen...
a trip to Japan
would fill my soul
with money with a little hole...
A hundred for a dollar
how would I keep count?
Looking for nirvana
While my expenses mount.
I shell out the folding paper
guessing at its worth
round the temple I go
kicking up the earth
A hundred Buddhas stare at me
with a golden smile
perhaps I’ll stay in Nippon-land
and chill out here in style
estimations an easy game
when none of it matters
I’ll go home to Aotearoa
and leave my dream in tatters.
Downstream
Higher Power guides my way
keeping me safe
and not astray
Events don’t go the way I planned
but HP has got it sorted
Prayer should not be my last resort
but the key that opens my day
and the lock when I turn out my light
The less I struggle
the more serene
acceptance & surrender
no longer a dream
when I float down
the stream of life.
